I use to be so naive
For believing in things
That were against my dreams
The toxic role models
Were the best I ever seen
Because my exposure was limited
I had no real stars on my team.
So many broken homes
& Fake facades
It looked like a happy home
But my abode was a garage
I kept up my own mirage
Because I was timid and alone
Things looked so easy
But they were hard.
Lacking love and affection
Misguided because no one knew the right direction
I was expecting
For her to nurture the soil but she didn’t get it.
Continued to leave me in the cold
Instead of love
She continued to scold
& For so many years she had this toxic hold
Until I had to break the generational curse
It was time to let go.
I never speak on how I grew
The less people knew
The easier it was for me to get through.
Internally damaged and bruised
She was beating me black and blue
To be with the woman in my dreams
It wasn’t you.
It’s so sad how things have changed
Constantly inflicting personal delays
Working against all the days I prayed
Down in the slums
She wants me to stay.
But I had to learn she didn’t know
Naive on how to properly show
The cycle continued
But I could take no more
I declare today the day, I finally let go.
So Ms. Jackson you played your part
In shattering the pieces of my naive heart
Did nothing for me
But take the spark
Even on my sunniest days
You prayed for me to be in the dark.
So now I know that things are true
Stuck on yourself
So fcking mean and awkwardly rude
Mad at the world because of your life
When I’m the one who should have the attitude.